A
man calls to ask me and asks "how are you"
I
stop and enter the gates of my inner mental prison
The place I didn't choose to
know
But
it clenched on to me as I drew a first breath
And now I explore the halls and
inner agony
They are cold and concrete
I
yell out in this void
What
do you know?
A
voice returns and it sounds like mine
And it is the eater of time
The
infestation of decaying
growth As a candle in fire
Progressing
through the trials
Being
unraveled and taking in new wire
It never ends
And
I try to drive away
I
choke the leathered wheel
To drive to a location
But
still all lives become a distraction
What counts is my destination
But
the world gives me a different destination
They say
Take
time in the forest
It is silent
It
is close
It
is humongous
It is
overbearing It
is oblivious
It
is lonely
Though
there is no fruit in my mind
No goodness
No
better outcome
I'd
rather choose to
Take time in the know
It is earning
It
is developing
It
is understanding It is cultivating
It
is
affecting It
is training
It is instruction It
is observing It
is nurturing
Yet
the woods whisper to me
They tell me to jump
They
see an action waiting to happen
I see the unknown
expanding
from a vast crevice in front of me
it
contains the mysteries of the universe
I
must jump I must jump for he tells me to trust him
Trust? Trust! Trust!!!
I've
trusted before
The
rose does look pretty
So
why not lay in the garden
Only wanting to embrace it
The idea of beauty
But
the red of the roses
Became the red of my blood
As the thorns pricked my skin
And stabbed my trust
Trust!!!
Trust! Trust?
He
is the quintessence of life
I take the jump
I
only endure to the continuous falling
It gives me time to think
What
is Love?
I
don't know
What
do you mean you don't know
I just don't know
Tell
me the truth
I
don't know what it is
Why do you say
that Ahhhhhh
Come
back
Of course I know, but never let a monster out of its
chains
The truth is I don't want to get close to that creaking chain
I know what it contains and it is
splinters in my brain
Yes
forgive forgive
forgiveNo fight fight
fight
Of
course I am wrong, but never let the truth hurt
The truth is I am the monster
in the chain
I
put myself here, a quick excuse is fear
I
cry frequently but I don't use the tears to rust the chain
I use it to refill
my day for tomorrow
So
the aching pain can come back again
With a new strenuous sorrow
I
want out of this chain
I want to be free
But
greater the chances
This monster will hurt
me
Actually
The
monster is not near
And I still feel pain
Truth must be the way
But I am scared
Most
people are
So many scars?
They
come back twice as strong
But I wanted to be gentle not strong
It takes time
I
have given it time
So now it will take action
So
now I leave this chaos of inner thought
And answer the man saying "I am fine"
Because
a lie can hide the insecure fool's mess
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